No matter how many kids you do or don’t have, we could all learn something new. Here’s a good reminder of the Do’s and Don’ts of parenting.
Monthly Archives: January 2008
We’re not the type to tell anyone our names until we announce that the baby has arrived. There are many reasons for this, but we mostly like to keep the drama going. We like the surprise of it.
When I was pregnant with our third child, we went down to visit my husband’s family to attend a wedding. I was about 5 months along. Of course, the same questions came up. What are you going to have? What are you going to name it? etc. etc. We were already notorious for not answering these questions, but this time, we thought it would be a good idea to come up with some fake names to give people. We knew most people wouldn’t buy it, but we knew one person who probably would.
My sister-in-law, Donna. She believes the best about people and takes their word at face value. So she was just gullible enough.
We told my father-in-law so he could play along. After the wedding, when everyone had changed into comfy clothes and we were all sitting around chatting, Mr. French set it up.
“I know we usually never tell people what names we’re thinking of, but this time we were hoping to get your opinion about it first.”
“Oh, okay. I’d love to hear.” pipes in Mr. French’s father.
“Well, for a boy we were thinking, Dirk Durham D____.” Nobody says a word. “And if it’s a girl, we were thinking, Dorcas Daisy D____. What do you think?”
Mr. F’s Dad looked excited, “I think I like those. That’s good.”
Donna face looked a bit stricken, but she didn’t say anything.
“What do you think, Donna?” asked Mr. French.
That’s when we all started laughing. It took her a minute to register that we were actually joking.
She said later that she just kept thinking, “O.K. they never tell us their names, so don’t mess this up. But why does everyone like these names?”
It’s probably no secret to the three people that read this blog that I’ve been sick since Christmas. I’m about 12 weeks now. I’m still sick, but there are hints that I’m feeling better. The two most noticeable, are the fact that I can walk erect all the time now (instead of hunched over like I’m going to puke at any moment) and I can walk to the kitchen and get food and get back to bed without thinking I need to lay down or I might. just. die. So, while I threw up yesterday (first time in 8 days! Progress!) I still feel constant nausea, every night from around 6 pm-until I can go to sleep.
So let’s talk about something fun and exciting instead.
We need girl names. We have 4 full (first and middle) names for boys. And they are mostly prioritized too.
But girls. We have never agreed on a girl’s name. Nor have we ever needed to. Once, when I was pregnant with S (my second child) we made a deal. I agreed to give Mr. French his first choice for a first name and he gave me my first choice for a middle name (we both agreed that they went together). It would only be binding for that current child and would become null and void after the birth if we had a boy. Which we did.
Now, I don’t really like the first name that we chose back then. Plus, the pressure is on. This could be our last child (I certainly can’t tell the future). It could be our only girl. It could be that we’ll never get to use any more of the boy’s names that we picked. So we have to make sure that we love this name. (I guess we should have thought that way for the others, but we didn’t.)
So here are the guidelines:
1) Anyone can play, as many times as you want, but you can’t suggest your own name. (You can, however leave your name, which still might cause me to think of it as a suggestion 🙂 Aren’t you clever?)
2) We don’t like especially popular names. Being in the top ten or twenty usually makes us leave the name behind, no matter how much we like it.
3) This is probably the only place where our age gap gets us into trouble (lest you think it’s me that’s older, it’s actually Mr. French :). Names that I like, b/c they’re unusual and old-fashioned, sound like names of Mr. F’s parent’s generation, so he tends to dislike them. Mr. French doesn’t mind names from his generation, which are names I associate with older people. I’m not explaining this well, but I think people tend to reject the names from their parent‘s generation, unless they are naming their children after someone specific. We’re more likely to fall for names in our grandparent‘s generation, or something more traditional that is not tied to a certain generation. So that means you have to go back further to find names we like, or go unusual and traditional. Clear as mud? Good. Moving on.
4) The other thing that is hard for us is that Mr. F likes a theme, or a pattern. For instance, if we named all our children with Biblical names (which we didn’t) he would be against changing that for the fourth. I don’t like themes. I try hard to give them all different first letters, different, but well-thought out initials, different number of syllables even. I don’t want any of my kid’s names to rhyme with each others.
5) I don’t like naming a child one name and then immediately start calling them a nickname. That happens a lot with girl’s names, so I think about it.
6) We’re looking for something feminine, pretty, and unusual that doesn’t start with hard C, S, or J. 🙂
7) Also, middle names cannot start with a vowel. Our last name starts with a ‘D’ and usually makes a word if the middle initial is a vowel.
8) If you participate, you can not be offended if we don’t use your name suggestion. 🙂
9) You will not know what name we chose until the baby is already named. I’m asking for suggestions, not opinions. 🙂
Though, I’ll still comment on names as they come. I think names are fascinating and I enjoy talking about them. 🙂
10) Funny is good. I need some distractions.
So, leave a comment. Or I’ll have to start giving myself suggestions.
Mr. French was changing the sheets on our bed.
I was laying on the floor trying not to vomit.
The lights flickered on and off a few times because of the rainstorm outside and then went off for a good long 30 seconds or so.
The boys protested with each outage.
When the lights finally came back on, C said, “That was a long time, Dad.”
“Yeah, well, there’s nothing we can do about it.”
“Well. Could we get a different house?”
All three of the boys pronounce Chocolate the French way. As in, “I don’t like cho-co-laa.” (they do like brownies, but not most other forms of chocolat.)
If I write their names in cursive, they think I wrote their name in French.
The two older boys often count things and they usually count in French and English.
A few weeks ago, Mr. French was watching a French film with English subtitles and as soon as the boys heard it they said, “They’re speaking in French!”
“Do dragons like to eat soup?”