The History of Black Friday…according to me (part three)

(I had no idea this would be three parts when I started.)

So the infamous Black Friday shopping trip was never supposed to be. I think we were both completely certain that there was nothing that any store could offer to make us get up at some crazy dark hour to get.

Unfortunately, we couldn’t have been more wrong. Our second son, S, was sick a lot when he was little. Every six weeks or so he would vomit for about 36-48 hours. We never figured out why, exactly, but he eventually outgrew it. (Although, he still has a weak stomach like his mother.)

Thanksgiving proved to be no exception and the night before, at a restaurant with my parents, he threw up. And then continued through the next day. So, when all was said and done Thursday night and he was still not keeping much down, we started thinking about going to Wal-mart (so close and so convenient!) for Pedialyte. Oh, and we need diapers, too.

Now, by this time we were oh so much more experienced and far wiser than in times past. We knew that you don’t wait until 5am to try to get Pedialyte at Wal-mart on the day after Thanksgiving. No, you go earlier, before all the Black Friday crazy people can go through the registers.

So, Mr. French sets off with list in hand and walks on over. He first picks up the diapers and (mistake # 1) puts it in his cart. Then he looks for the Pedialyte. On his way to the register, he got sidetracked by something shiny (puzzles). (Oh, you don’t think that buying a puzzle for your out-of-town guests who were now stuck in a two bedroom apartment with a vomiting 3 year-old is important enough for Black Friday shopping? Well, that makes two of us.)

So, the puzzles being very shiny, but the people being very crowdy, Mr. French has to leave his cart in the aisle (mistake #2) to get to the shiny puzzles where he has to ponder each and every possibility. You know what happens next. The cart, magically disappears, along with the two things Mr. French really needed and he must then make his way through the throngs of people to the diaper section once more. Once procured for the second time, he then heads for the registers at decidedly the worst possible time. Yes, that would be when everyone in the entire store can now go through the checkout lines.

And now you know why I’ll never get Mr. French to go to the store (any store) on the Friday after Thanksgiving. (And yes, our out-of-town guests did enjoy putting together a shiny new puzzle that day.)

Actually, this year, I checked out the flyers and for a minute there I was tempted by the Target sales…but then…

then I tossed them in the trash.

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2 Comments

Filed under I confess, I'm a pretend writer, Moving is my hobby, Mr. French, That's just gross, This is going to be really funny one day

2 responses to “The History of Black Friday…according to me (part three)

  1. Joy

    Probably doesn’t matter now, since he already outgrew it, but you could check out cyclic vomiting syndrome, in case one of your other kids ends up having the same thing. After my oldest had many mystifying vomiting episodes, I finally read about it and figured out what to do for her. Since then, she’s had fewer, shorter episodes.

    I’ve never tried to shop on Black Friday (except online)…I think I’ve heard too many stories like yours to want to try it πŸ™‚

  2. redchampagne

    Interesting. I’d never heard of that before. I hope I never get it. πŸ™‚

    It happened once when we were out of town and had left the kids with friends (in fact, I think it was for your wedding). Anyway, my friend’s theory was that maybe it was something on baby carrots that he reacted to (since they are treated differently than other similar vegetables) (and he had eaten a bunch of them the night before). I do think it decreased after I stopped buying them and I’ve never bought them since. Who really knows at this point. I was always given to vomiting when I was little and he still is the same way now.

    This last year our entire family has had 3 different episodes of “stomach virus” (that lovely catch-all phrase) and I was starting to think it was just Texas’ fault. (I’m still sort of inclined to blame the whole state.)

    Since someone died last year during a black friday stampede, I’ve been far less tempted by any of it. I’m doing all my shopping online this year anyway.

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