Category Archives: These are the things I want to remember

When boys do housework

When boys sort the laundry:

Believe it or not, the laundry actually got done that day. Eventually.

When boys put the dishes away:

I tell people that having three boys at these ages is like herding puppies. They wrestle all the time. For fun. Even with kids they’ve just met.

And I listen to a lot of bad jokes.

-The octopus said “what a lovely day”.

The man said “it’s not a lovely day”.

Why did the man say that? Because it was raining. Get it?

-Felicity asked for a hot dog. Calvin said, “why don’t you ask the dog.”

-Why does the lady keep exploding? Because she keeps drinking TNT.

-What did the light say to the other light? I’m lighter than you.

-The thief says to the mummy, “I’ll shoot your brains out.” Mummy: “Haha. I don’t have any brains.”

-Why did the old women keep shooting to the sky? Because she kept eating firecrackers.

And there’s always more where that came from.

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Filed under Boys will be boys, These are the things I want to remember, This is going to be really funny one day

Ethan is a bat (probably)

It wasn’t an easy conclusion to come to, but it doesn’t make sense any other way.

See, we put him to bed in his crib, in a room he shares with his sister. Round about 3 or 4 or 5 in the morning he wakes up, decides to get up (nocturnal, anyone?) climbs out of his crib (or flies, it’s not like we’re watching him) and then makes his way through his usually toy shrewn room in the dark, opens the door, always closes the door and then walks through the dark house (can he see in the dark or does he have a sonar system?). He then opens our door, closes our door (not quietly) and then stands by my bed staring at me until I wake up. At least I assume he’s staring, except that it’s dark and I can’t see. (I’m not a bat.) It’s creepy and I’m pretty sure that’s what bats do.

But if I haven’t convinced you yet, this next part will (probably) do it.

So, the same sonar system, nocturnal, up in the night, star at mom while she sleeps, creepy bat maneuver happened the other night around 3 am. He nursed, he fussed, I turned over and ignored him and he feel asleep. I woke up a little chilly and reached for the covers, only to discover that there was an upside down bat child in my bed. His head was around where my knees were. And his feet were in smelling distance. So, not only could I not pull up the covers, but I also had to sleep with a bat that can kick.

Also? He eats fruit.

(Totally a bat.)

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Filed under Aren't my kids funny?, Boys will be boys, These are the things I want to remember

A Tantrum Throwing Tip, brought to you by Ethan

Have you ever had poor service?

Like your Mom is taking too long to get your lunch?

Or she had to put you down to take something out of the oven?

She didn’t get you the right snack?

Or, most egregious, she put your water in the wrong cup?

When these things happen, I suggest you throw yourself to the ground and wail it out.

The problem, of course, is that tile is hard. So, a little tip I’ve discovered is that in between starting to cry, throwing your cup or toy to the ground, and actually falling to the ground in despair, you look for a soft place to land.

If there are two choices, go to the one closest, so you’ll look more authentic. You might have to walk a little ways to get there, so keep crying and moving and when you make it to the rug, then throw yourself down. Try not to hit your head, though or you might start crying for real.

I’m sure no one will notice the delay. They’ll be so distressed by your great displeasure, they’ll be frantically trying to find the proper cup for your beverage.

(Although, come to think of it, I never did get that cup of water I ordered yesterday.)

I love my life.

I love my life.

 

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Filed under Boys will be boys, That was fun, These are the things I want to remember, This is going to be really funny one day

All about Ethan

You can tell that Ethan is the fifth child by looking at his baby book.

I can just imagine the conversation now, 18 years before it happens.

Girlfriend: Oh, I want to see your baby book. By the way, your Mom seems really cool.*

Ethan: Uh, Okay.

Girlfriend: Um. How do you know this is yours? It’s….empty.

Ethan: Oh. That’s because my Mom had a blog. It doesn’t mean she didn’t love me.

Girlfriend: Uh-huh.

*What? It could happen.

So, this will be a little update on Ethan.

He is now 9 months old.

A couple days ago, his first tooth popped in.

And like his older late teething brother before him, Ethan started eating just last week. Prior to now, when I offered him food or put food in his mouth to try it out, he was convinced I was trying to kill him by poisoning or choking. This week I was eating something and he grabbed my hand and stuffed it in his mouth. And he’s been trying food ever since.

I don’t know his height or weight but he’s mostly wearing size 12 months. Except for pajamas. I realized last night that he’s been wearing the same sleepers since birth. They were a little big on him then and they’re a little snug on him now but, I think that’s got to be worth some frugal points. Plus, bonus points when I tell you that they were given to me for J (who wore them) and here you can see Miss Felicity wearing the same one.

He also did this:

I  realize that’s not very exciting but he had actually pushed it a fair distance at that point. Of course, I didn’t get my camera out in time to capture it all. (We were in a therapist’s office.) (Not that kind of therapist.) (Or that kind.)

Also, one cute thing I want to remember. Sometimes when I hold him on my shoulder and pat him on the back (usually at night when I’m putting him back to bed), he’ll pat my shoulder back.

Altogether now: Awwwwe.

He was one of my best sleepers as an infant. He slept through the night pretty early on. And kept it up for awhile. And now he gets up at least twice a night. Sometimes more, sometimes less, but he hasn’t slept through the night in months. I just thought I’d throw that in there in case you were getting jealous.

We’ll still keep him though.

For a couple more years anyway.

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Filed under Aren't my kids funny?, She's having a baby, These are the things I want to remember

Guess who just turned 10?

So, when we were still in the Dallas area, we let S open his presents a little early.

And then we took pictures with our iphones, hence the following bad pictures. (The best part is at the end if you just want to skip.)



If you don’t know what Gamera is, I’d suggest you do yourself a favor and keep it that way.

Unless you like Scary-Japanese-Giant-Turtle movies.

In which case, you’re probably either a 10 year old boy or you used to be one.

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Filed under Boys will be boys, These are the things I want to remember, This is going to be really funny one day

What to do with a fast nose and other conversations

A conversation:

Felicity: My nose is so fast.

Me: Your nose is so fast?

F: Yes. I don’t know why it do that.

Me: Oh, you mean it’s runny?

F: Yeah.

____________________________________

Boy1: That was a fun day!

Boy2: I wish we could have a Valentine’s Day party everyday!

Boy3: I can’t wait until dinnertime when we can tell Daddy about all the things we got. He will probably be disappointed that he didn’t get to go to the Valentine’s Day party.

Me: Yeah. Probably.

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Filed under Aren't my kids funny?, These are the things I want to remember, This is going to be really funny one day

She just doesn’t get enough credit

And if this isn’t an advertisement for Golden Retrievers as family pets, I don’t know what is.

It’s also an advertisement on the un-tastiness of fur.

Like we all needed a video to figure that out.

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Filed under She's having a baby, That's just gross, The Dog, These are the things I want to remember